I almost started this off with “sorry haven’t posted in a while…” but honestly I have nothing to apologize for. For the past few years, I have been putting a lot of pressure on myself to perform flawlessly at all times. One thing I’ve never admitted publicly is that as the founder of this company as well as a full-time student, it is unrealistic to juggle everything and maintain a healthy stress level at all times.
I have never been one to share the small details of my personal life online – especially those tiny details that would suggest that I am going through it. I believe that fully functioning people never complain, and particularly they do not complain about the rocks being rough. While that may be ideal, life is not perfect, and I must accept that some human responses although less than ideal are what make us relatable. Point blank, things get in the way of me being consistent with Amplified sometimes. Usually, I brush the setbacks off quickly, but most recently, an unforeseen shake-up at the end of this past semester prompted me to take some time away from Amplified to work on myself.
These three weeks away have shown me the importance of prioritizing my mental health. I have spent the past few weeks reading, writing, and running as much as I can. I have made it a point to get outside every day and do kid things like throw frisbees and litter my driveway with chalk drawings. I have been actively reflecting on the important things in my life; otherwise this would be a prolonged bout of avoidance. I have come to the realization that to continue doing the things I enjoy, I will need to apply a sense of balance to my everyday life. The balance between work and maintaining my happiness – giving myself time to do the things that add quality to my life – in the long run, will be most crucial in my search for consistency.
It goes without saying that I am as stress-free as I have been in quite some time. Behind the scenes, the “glow up” has been great, but I cannot help but feel like I have failed you all on this platform. Delayed releases and general absence in the online yo-yo community have been the price of not dealing with my stress appropriately this year. I’m at a point where neglecting Amplified will not cut it anymore. Neither will letting my imperfections distract me from my purpose. I am now granting myself permission to be human, embrace my limitations, and use them as fuel to evolve and adjust accordingly.
Now that I am back expect things to pick up for Amplified. I’m overly focused; it’s far from time to rest now.